Caring for a Elderly Parent, Who is Going to Care for Us?

The latest surveys show that approximately thirteen million baby boomers are now actively caring for an ailing and/or ageing parent. According to the U.S. Census, Boomers account for 27% of the total U.S. population. The Census officials predict that the number of boomers accepting the role as caregiver to increase dramatically over the next decade. With this growth will come to opportunity to seriously consider, understand and come to terms with the difficult dynamics involved in the “Parent-Child” relationship. From the time we are born until the time we die, we all play certain expected life roles. In time we become comfortable with and reach acceptance of the particular "life roles stage" we are in at any given time. But unfortunately as fate would have it, we are experiencing constant growth and changes in the cycle of life. So just when we get it down and feel comfortable and think we understand --- Oh yes, the next life stage comes along and we have to start all over again. Having a child the greatest joy life has to offer. The relationship between parent and child is one of the most complicated, unique and beautiful of the "life stage changes" cycles. Our life roles are definitely, clearly defined with is one. The unbreakable bond a child has for their parent is amazing. There is a loyalty and attachment that time and events can't destroy. Even a child who has been abused by a parent will defend that parent to the end. Parents watch their child grow and mature with great pleasure and pride. Children watching their parent grow and mature is not the same rewarding experience. Facing immortality is a tough one to deal with. Watching the road of the final leg of our journey is even tougher. Caring for an ill or aging parent puts both the child and parent in changing roles that neither is comfortable with. No matter what the circumstances, the child will always be the child and the parent will always be the parent and that is where a lot of conflict comes into play. Finding Our New Perspective Listen with your heart, touch and feel with love, see with understanding and patience. Sit quietly and watch closely the person you are giving care to. How do all these "life role changes" affect them, emotionally, physically, mentally? How are they dealing with this new situation? Are your responses making it easier or causing more chaos? You need to adapt to this new situation in your life together like the team you have always been. You now have the opportunity to redefine your relationship. Please work together, not against each other. Nothing in our world is forever. We are in a constant cycle of change.
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